2018 Almost Stole My Joy

As 2019 begins, I’ve been reflecting- like most of us do- on the last year. My life, the changes, my behaviour, friendships, career.. all of it.

Something that has really struck me is how much I was sad.
The year wasn’t sad. I married my best friend, went on tour, furthered my career, had the best honeymoon. But my joy wasn’t there for a good portion of the year.

Part of that was-
Losing friendships (that weren’t good for me anyway)
Career changes (that needed to happen)  
And life in general, moving quicker than I sometimes want it to.

But something I’ve noticed as I reflect and read through my journal this last year and relive the roller coaster of emotions that was 2018 is a pattern.  
The small things were what got me down.

It wasn’t the big things; like the tour (I was so excited about) turning out to be nothing like I had thought it would be, or a bridesmaid dropping out the week before my wedding (!!!). It was the small stuff.
The things that almost stole my joy were the day to day- something went wrong..  I spilled my coffee, forgot my coffee at home, made decaf coffee… (okay maybe I have an issue with how much coffee I drink) small things.

So I’m going to do 2019 differently.

The small stuff that makes up every minute of every day, is just that- small stuff. It happens in an instant, and then it’s gone. Why should I let five bad minutes ruin the other 1,435 minutes in a perfectly good day?
There’s no sense in that.

So this year, I’m going to focus more on what matters. I’m going to remember that I am loved, that I am unique, and that there is nobody else in the world that can do *exactly* what I do. In 2019 I’m choosing to be more focused on the positives. This is a year for change, and I’m embracing it.

Happy New Year all.